Miles O'Brien

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$5 delivery

Ugh. They always try to get you with the shipping… Pass.

I have been filling out applications recently and one place wanted me to download a mobile app that would record camera and microphone stuff while I filled out the application

Another company wanted me to record responses on a Webcam.

Whatever the fuck I feel like, damn.

Nosey ass search engine…

Hey, you.

YEAH YOU! WITH THE FACE ON YOUR HEAD!

YOU are a FULLY FLEDGED HUMAN BEING with VALID FEELINGS and DIFFICULTIES!

YOU are BEAUTIFUL and HAVE THE CAPABILITY OF GREAT STRENGTH whether you REALIZE IT OR NOT

YOU can FACE THE DAY ahead and NOBODY CAN STOP YOU unless you LET THEM

If someone wants to HATE YOU FOR EXISTING, then you have to EXIST AS HARD AS POSSIBLE because they aren’t going to change, but YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT PETTY SHITHEADS

GO GET EM, TIGER

That place is a monument to mankind’s arrogance.

The taxes from it go to schools.

Dozens of people have gotten a chuckle out of this over the years. dozens!

“I’m gonna make a sunny-side-up egg for my toast today”

cracks egg, yolk shatters into 10,000 pieces when it hits the pan

“I’m making scrambled eggs today.”

Skill issue, tbh

The worst fucking game I’ve ever played.

30-something years invested and I have fuckall to show for it.

Damn, the only people I want to share this with who would understand it, would be offended.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know your trigger was s*y milk, do you need a safe space to calm down before facing the big scary coffee shop again?”

A proper response to someone giving you shit about soy milk or almond milk or any other type.

Or anyone who parrots Republicans and their AnTi-wOkEnEsS lines.

But that isn’t the criteria they’re working with in any news report or court case, is it?

If I draw up some plans on a napkin with crayon, make my thing based on that, and “QC” says all the parts are to spec, and it fails and looks like shit in the process… I would say that is FAR more improvised than the guy making a pipe bomb out of hardware store supplies that’s set off by a complex electronic custom timer/signal receiver.

I do get your point, I’m just being slightly ridiculous for humor’s sake.

It’s all entirely “did someone make this in a factory with government approval or not”

Y’know… In this hypothetical news story/court case…

They had an app store?

Yeah, but to be fair, those were smallish nukes, and we only saw those go up against large bugs.

Not a net or trident in sight.

Not a fair comparison.

Every extreme sport is insane if you dissect it with rational thought about human frailty.

It’s great!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go strip to thin breathable cloth so I can tear along the countryside at speeds humans weren’t designed to travel at, while dodging trees, bushes, occasional wildlife, roots and rocks, hoping my air filled donut bladders don’t rupture and none of the welds on my metal stick give out. Once I’m done I’ll cool off with a nice downhill roll, rivaling the cheetah on speed.

That said… Caves are one of those places I’d love to go to one someday but it won’t be relaxing for me. They can be scary as FUCK. Don’t even get me started on cave diving. Those people are insane and in need of therapy.

And for the same production value and some brightly colored spandex, so can you!

Never underestimate how many ways you can dress up a rock quarry. Just ask the members of SG-1

“Is there AIR? YOU DON’T KNOW!”

Old people and overreacting to normal things because new ideas are scary and confusing

Name a more iconic duo

There’s plenty in improvised weaponry that can maim or kill you if not done properly,

the only way to find out is from people beforehand passing on knowledge, firsthand experience, or being really good at brainstorming.

You’d probably figure it out before you went to throw, unfortunately if you’re rushed (like in active combat areas) you don’t always have the luxury of time to figure things out.

Mine can, a little bit.

The trickier question is “can blacksmith forges coopt disaster for massive government overreach and restricting of privacy” but that’s way less catchy for the conspiracy theorists.