Alt text: a text post that reads: Work in retail long enough, and you’ll eventually realize the rules for dealing with Customers are exactly the same as dealing with the Fae:

• Avoid eye contact.
• Never reveal your full name.
• Accept nothing They offer you.
• Never verbally agree or disagree with anything They might happen to say.
• To apologize is to acknowledge a debt owed.
• Under no circumstances are you ever to thank Them.
• Remember that They are incapable of reading signs in human languages.